Coping with your newborn

Parents have their hands full immediately after the birth of their baby. Caring for their new dependent takes up so much of their time, concentration, and emotions. Some parents become overwhelmed in the process of learning. These sections provide information on:

• Support for parents
• Keeping calm during newborn crying spells
• Identifying needs for parents and newborn

Support for parents

Having help from midwives and health visitors can ease the stresses and allow parents to also nurture each other as they care for their little one. Opting to have help initially can allow a mother to adjust calmly to her newborn and also allow parents to ask questions if they are unsure of what to do or if they are doing the caring right. Some women also need to talk about either emotions, such as sadness or depression, sexuality and future intercourse.

Being involved in postnatal appointments, and parenting groups can also offer further support on care for the newborn, understanding communication, keeping up relationships, and coping in general.

Keeping calm during newborn crying spells

The main areas where parents are at risk of feeling overwhelmed is when the baby cries and for whatever reason, does not seem to stop and cannot communicate why. Instead of feeling frustrated, try to:

• Stop and slow down
• Take a break
• Observe the baby and possible need or illness
• Treat your baby gently
• Try soothing strategies like music, singing, colourful chimes
• Move with the baby or take the baby out
• Express what you feel to others (but do not take out negative emotion on the newborn)
• Realise when you cannot cope
• Ask for help if needed

Expressing negative emotion at your newborn is not the answer because although it is your showing of frustration, it can destroy the bond between mother and baby, build lack of trust, and cause the baby social-cognitive challenges later on in life. Harming a baby physically, such as hitting and shaking can cause disability and legal action against the parent.

Identifying needs for parent and newborn

If a parent cannot cope, professional help should be sought. Parent care is the first support for newborn care and identifying and addressing the needs of parents too is a way of meeting the needs of the newborn. Whether lack of sleep, work, financial or relationship pressures contribute to stress and frustration, help is available to relieve the tension for both the comfort of parents and baby.

Lack of sleep during initial phases of caring for the newborn is a major contributing factor to stress. Parents can address their sleep needs by:

• Not sharing the bed with the newborn
• Allowing your baby initial tears before falling asleep
• Taking the opportunity to sleep with the baby sleeps in their cot
• Not feeling you have to entertain visitors
• Sharing newborn care with a partners or healthcare visitor

Sometimes even with sleep or trying strategies to get enough sleep, parents can still feel exhausted and stressed. Having a sleep environment and preparing for sleep helps. Also treating any other factors that may contribute to insomnia may provide comfort. Reducing stress will keep your baby feeling calmer and there are a number of ways in which you can do this:

• Expect and accept some sleepless nights and feelings of frustration
• Don’t place additional pressures on yourself about expectations, meals and cleaning
• Remember that the baby is developing through phases
• Make sure you are eating nutritionally and drinking enough fluid
• Give yourself time to do something daily that you enjoy
• Have outings and get exercise
• Have a laugh
• Develop a routine and rules about how you want to cope so that you feel in control
• Also allow your baby also to direct how the care routine works
• Talk with others about feelings and concerning thoughts
• Have a laugh and build relationships with others
• Trust another who is able to help out
• Ask for professional help when needed

Caring for your newborn:

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• Caring for your newborn
• What are dummies?
• Newborns and movement
• Burping your baby
• Playing with your newborn
• Caring for newborns with and without circumcision
• Baby hair loss
• Baby Massage
• Newborn Clothing: Dressing and body temperature
• Newborn and home safety
• Newborn: When others want to hold or touch
• Babies and pets
• Baby constipation
• Baby clothes
• What should my first aid kit contain?
• Taking a baby’s temperature
• Baby medicine

• Coping with your newborn
• Newborn: When to call a doctor?
• Baby hygiene
• Trimming baby nails
• Caring for babies’ bottoms
• Baby poo
• How to care for your newborn’s body
• Newborns and nappies
• Caring for your Baby’s Clothes
• Baby Milestones
• Baby first aid
• Common baby emergencies
• How to help a choking baby
• Baby vomiting
• Keeping your baby safe
• Baby Monitors
• Baby swimming

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